You wanna know why I became a hula dancer?
Well, it was an accident…
Coming out of COVID, I was ready to take a fun free class down at the senior community center down the street from my house.
After going through all the classes that were offered, I enrolled in a French class and a Hula class even though I was worried I wouldn’t be allowed to join since it was a class for seniors.
I had nothing to worry about. They welcomed me with open arms and I instantly fell in love with the community, the class, and most of all, with hula.
Unrelated, but I ended up dropping that French class.
I loved how hula gave my body permission to move without shame or guilt. It was like hula was the language that my body spoke. It felt natural and right to move in this way.
I loved how hula made me feel. At the time, I was learning about energy and hula moves allowed that energy to come out and move around my body.
I loved the stories that our dances told. At the time, I was toying with the idea of being a storyteller. Being able to share stories about the indigenous people of the islands with my hips became a spiritual practice that transcended space and time.
There were even talks of doing performances (which made my inner child very excited) but nothing ever worked out…
After about a year and a half, we moved and my hula dreams were crushed.
I don’t know why it didn’t occur to me to look for a halau (hula studio) until A YEAR after I moved but at least I found it eventually.
I think I needed the time to choose hula. As a deeply spiritual person, hula chose me to express its stories through my body.
Now I needed to decide if my body wanted to express stories that didn’t belong to it culturally.
- when i was little, i used to do ballet folkorico. i liked it fine. it was fun. we danced in parades. but idk it just didnt feel like me. i always felt so guilty for feeling that. im mexican. why does hula feel more me than my own cultural dance?
ChatGPT outlined multiple ways that Mexicans and Hawaiians have shared similar stories. Both cultures are very grounded. They connect with the land. They were both colonized. And fun fact: Mexicans taught Hawaiians how to be cowboys and there are Hawaiian cowboys. I even danced a song commemorating them at the community center in Redlands.
The ocean had a majority share. The ocean has told me that it chose hula for me because it is the language that it speaks too so we can better communicate. I think hula has taught me how to flow better like the ocean waves.
Interestingly, all this wrestling is occurring more now than during that year period.
So after the year, I found my now halau and I had to audition to get in. It was so nerve racking since I hadn’t danced in so long.
They went over the choreography and I actually picked it up easily! I got in!
The problem was they were teaching kahiko (ancient-style hula), and I only knew ‘auana (modern-style). I spent a year switching over—only to realize I actually need to know both.
I liked this hālau because they were strict but fair. I enjoyed dissecting the movements of the dances and learning more about Hawaiian culture. We had occasional quizzes and had to learn multiple Hawaiian words (which, as a polyglot, I thoroughly enjoyed) as well as several chants. We also learned how to sew to make our costumes, including kūpe‘e (ti leaf bracelets for our wrists and ankles) and lei (ti leaf necklaces) to complete our outfits.
By happenstance, I ended up going to hula camp. Hula camp made me fall even deeper in love with hula and Hawaiian culture.
I took a class on how to make a fresh flower lei po’o by hand. I learned a new hula from a new instructor and a noho hula (hula sitting down on ankles) with an oli (chant).
A few months later, I graduated (ho’opuka)! It was a really special event because my and my husband’s parents came to see my graduation. I felt like a kid again. My inner child was beaming.
Since then, I have performed 3 times.
The first time was at the Santa Monica Pier 360 Beach Festival. I finally felt like myself again after 25+ years. Being on that stage felt like home. It was a small stage in a beer garden next to the muscle beach mini museum.
The second time was at Ho’olaule’a. This crowd was huge! It was probably 6-8 times bigger than the Santa Monica crowd. During this performance, I couldn’t stop smiling. My heart was beaming with joy. The dance flowed out of me effortlessly. It was also during this event that I got closer to my hula friends. We explored the rest of the festival together. I had a wonderful time! I ended up buying a Hawaiian skirt/dance and a couple pua (flower) clips.
The third time was at the Pasadena Library’s End of Summer Bash. My sister drove up from San Diego so that was really nice. Unfortunately, it was the only performance that wasn’t on a stage and it was the only performance where I messed up.
I could blame it on trying to focus on the words instead of the dance or the fact that someone else made a mistake and I blindly followed or maybe I was just overthinking it. I think it has to do with the crowd being so small and so close. I think I may still have a fear of being seen up close.
- unrelated to hula but more on that day: Prior to this performance, my husband and I drove all the way to Northridge to check out a job opportunity and then drove back taking the streets. It was really fun! Afterwards, we went to our nephew’s high school football team’s car wash. We had a family BBQ then left early (9PM lol) to go to a comedy show! We went to see Concrete and DoKnow. I had such a great time with my husband, his sister, and her husband!!
This was now a month and two days ago. I miss performing. Our next one is October 4th.
Ok so now to answer the question: why did I become a hula dancer?
Is it because I love performing? Because I love the community? the culture?
Is it because the ocean told me to? Because I feel closer to the Earth when I dance? the divine?
Is it because my body loves it? Because I feel so deeply connected to it? myself?
Clearly all the above, but above all, being a hula dancer isn’t something that I became, it is something that is so engrained in me that nothing could ever keep me away for too long, I have no doubt that I would have found my way to it no matter the circumstances.
This is something that I am still coming to terms with.
I am now in a more advanced class. Sometimes I’m scared I’m not good enough to be in this hard class but every time I start dancing, the worries fade, and I know I belong.
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